Garage Sales and Mami

This summer my aunt introduce my lovely mother to garage sales. At first it was harmless fun. Mami would stop at a garage sale during her Saturday morning errand run. She would pick up one or two things or sometime nothing at all. She would call up my aunts, sister, and other family members and tell them of stuff she found that she thinks they could use/need/want. Pretty soon it became an obsession. Mami was hitting up 3-6 garage sales a day. Still only on Saturday but she spent most of her time garage sale shopping rather then food shopping. Chairs, tables, and artwork among other things started to appear everywhere in our house. When I would ask her about it she would tell me about the deal she got, with such joy that I just couldn't say anything about it to her.

As mami started to disappear for longer and longer hours at garage sale and more and more stuff started to appear at our house I started to get concern. So I talked to my dad about it, who just shrugged and said " What can I do chiquito? You know how your mom is." Thanks Papi.

My sister on the other hand laughed and told me not to worry that mami was just enjoying some retail therapy. So I let it go. That was until Mami asked me to hustle an older couple for a table. I could not believe that my sweet mother was asking me to hustle this old couple for a table. "Mami" I said. " What? People like you. You can talk them down for me." She said. I tried to reason with her but she would not listen, so I finally had to put my foot down. I would not hustle this older couple for her. She asked me nicely, I told her I wouldn't do it. She beg, I still wasn't going to do it. She threaten to call my father, nope still not doing it mami. Then she pulled out the only card she had left. My grandparents. I am a sucker for my grandparents.

In the end mami got her way. Well that's what she thinks at least. I could not do it. I could not hustle this cute little old couple over a table. I payed them the price they were asking for. When I got back home with the prized table mami just assumed that I was able to talk them down. I never corrected her. I did not see a reason why I should. She had her table (which we don't need) and the little old couple got their money (which they do need). So to me it was a win-win. I have never in my life been so excited for winter. It means the end of garage sales for a while, and hopefully by the time summer comes back around I will be able to send mami to garage sale rehab. Now I just have to make sure that I can keep thrift stores a secret.

Y no es de aquí porque su nombre no aparece en los archivos, ni es de allá porque se fue.

Two weekends ago I was able to go see Barack and Michelle Obama speak in Pueblo, Co. Pueblo is a 2 hr drive from Denver. Maga and Lili also wanted to go. So we packed ourselves into my car and we went on our way.

You could feel the excitement in the air. We where excited to see Barack and Michelle speak. We where excited for the then up coming elections. We where excited for the future and the change it held. On our drive down we started looking for cars with Obama stickers who we thought were also going in the same direction as us.

During our drive Lili and I where able to talk to Maga about our family, life, religion, politics and of course immigration among other things. Maga shared just a small amount of details of what it was like for her to come to the United States. She shocked Lili and I when she said " It was hard, but I know that it is hard for you guys also."

Maga understood that we had our own obstacles to over come. We are the first generation born in the United States. We are children of immigrants, children who really don't belong anywhere. Maga and Lili wanted to know what it had been like for me growing up with two cultures. Even though Lili is going through the same things I went through being her older cousin she wanted advice.

So I told her.

I told her that some days she would feel like she doesn't belong anywhere and that no one gets her. I told her that to some people we were always going to be too Latin to be American and too American to be Latin. That people where going to tell her that she spoke with an accent. It didn't matter if she spoke in Spanish or English. She would always speak with this so call accent that she could never notice but everyone else could.

I told her that balancing two cultures was going to be difficult. Some days it would feel impossible but she would be able to do it. That most days she would feel like she is torn in two. Her American side and her Dominican side. That some people would hold the fact that she is a U.S. citizen against her. That some people would hold the fact that she is Dominican against her. That she would encounter idiots who will judge her, but that at the same time she will encounter people who embrace her.

I told her to make peace with the fact that she is not really from here or there. To befriend people who are just like her, juggling two cultures and trying to make sense of it all.

I told her that we are lucky. We are lucky because we get to experience the best of both worlds, and to ignore the worst. We are lucky because we speak two languages.We get to experience two cultures. That we can eat mangu and salami for breakfast and McDonalds for dinner and not blink a eye. That we can dance to merengue and switch it hip-hop without missing a beat. That we can speak in Spanglish if we wanted to. That we are now a part of the majority. That we have advantages that our parents and grandparents never had. That most people wish that they where as lucky as we are. That some people die trying to get what we have.That the feeling of being inadequate and not belonging will fade with time. To use her two cultures to her advantage.

Three days later Barack Obama a black man, the son of an immigrant became president.

Benched

Two weeks after I started my new job, I got injured on the job. Great, so not only am I the new chick, but know I am the new chick who got hurt.

To tell you the truth I didn't even know I was hurt until I tried to put weight on my left leg. The first thing that ran through my minds was " hmm, that's a funny feeling". The sad thing is I didn't get hurt doing anything cool or dangerous. So I don't have an amazing story to tell you about my injury. I was simply unjamming the copier.

I pulled a tendon in my left knee. I was on crutches up until last week. I had to go to physical therapy and everything. Being on crutches sucked. I had never been on them before and let me tell you they suck. Physical therapy was o.k. I finished that last week as well. My doctor released me back to my regular work duty but I still have a hard time going downstairs but I can go up them. There are a few other things that I still can't do like dance, squat, kneel, but the doc says it will be a few months until I am completely healed. There are some other things that I can do but he rather I don't in case I re-injure myself. So I have been taking it easy.

One thing about getting injured is that I saw a new side to people and most of all myself. It has been something. The people I thought would be there to help me and take care of me weren't always there. The people I least expected to care where the first ones to offer to help. Amazing how that works out huh?

Anyways, I have to remind myself daily to take it easy. I can no longer go a million miles a minute like I use too. An other thing being injured has done is made me slow down. Which is something that I am not use too. If I try to over due it, I pay for it dearly that night or else the next day. I am getting better at taking things slowly then I was before. One day at a time, until I heal completely after that I can't promise that I won't go back to the old days of running a million miles a minute after all I am from New York.

Everyone knows I'm in over my head

Hi there, how's it going? I know it has been a while since I have posted. I am sorry about that but I just haven't had the time to be honest. My new job takes up ALL of my time. I do like my new job, but there are days when I feel overwhelmed, and then I start to wonder what did I get myself into. I still miss my old job and the people that I use to work with, but I have made new friends at my job and I am getting to know some of the families at the new place. Hmm maybe I should stop calling it the new place?

Anyways, for those of you out there in the blogger world who have Blackberry's I have to share something that my cousin recently discovered. I love using Blackberry Messanger. Recently my cousin Karina discovered that you can invite more then one person to a conversation on messanger. Which means that you end up having your own little chat room. Which really comes in handy when you have to tell a few people the same information. We have been using it like crazy and I for one can tell you that I love it.

Hmmm what else ooo yeah the boy, things did not go well there. He is some one that I have known for a while now but due to this reason or the other we never got together. Recently we where both single at the same time and I thought what the heck lets give it a try. Well lets just say that things went down hill fast after that. So that means that I am still taking applications...lol.

As you can see I been busy making some changes to this little blog. So what do you think? I am trying to recreat my blog roll so if I missed your blog please forgive me and then let me know so I can add you.

Hmm, I have other things that I want to share but I will have to post that in a may i recommend post. Oh and we need a new Papi Chulo list right?

They are turning my head out, To see what I’m all about

So I wrote this long post about my trip to NY. I included pictures and everything, but I have decided not to post it. I don't know why. Anyways my trip to NY was lovely and much needed. I had such a great time that sometimes I think that its not real, that it did not happen. It has been a while since I have laughed so much. It was so nice to be taken care of for once instead of taking care of everyone else. My aunt is so cute, when we would go out she would tell my cousins to take care of me and make sure not to lose me...lol like I was a 4 yr old kid who did not know how to read a map or speak English and Spanish or own a cell phone...lol. It was cute, because she told them that if they lost me they would have to deal with my grandmother cause I am her favorite...lol. All of the above is not true. I am not my grandmother's favorite, and as you can see they didn't lose me...lol

It was nice to see family that I haven't seen in a while and just be able to spend time with them. So many inside jokes have come out of those two weeks that it's not even funny. I was able to visit my cousin in New Jersey and my aunt and uncle in Philly. So in all I had a nice trip. I was even able to see Caro while I was out there, oh man if I thought I missed her before I miss her even more now. We had such a lovely time on the day we where able to hang out.

Coming back home was hard, a lot harder then I thought it was going to be. I am glad to be back home but I find myself missing New York and everyone who lives there from time to time.

I applied for and got a new job which I start on Friday. It is a bittersweet experience for me. I love the job that I am leaving but do to the funding situation it does not look like it will be around much longer. Which is why I had to look for a new job. I found another great job which I am sure I will love as much as the one I am leaving. It still doesn't make it any easier to leave. I love the people I work with and the same goes for the family we help. I have been there for so long that it is hard to leave them behind. I know that my new job is going to be good for me, its a great opportunity. So I am excited about that. I will let you know how that ends up going.

Other wise then that things are good. I have had a good time hanging out with Gabe and Joe my new movie watching buddies. There is another situation involving a boy but I will have to tell you about that at a later time.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

I will be in NYC from July 1-13th. I will try to post while I am there if not I will post when I get back. I hope that everyone has a great fourth of July. See You soon.

All The Pieces Of Me/ How To Save A Life

This post is going to be a total mess, so please bare with me.

I recently turned twenty seven. The birthday celebrations where good, but I keep going back to something I heard a comedian say a while ago he said that men should only date women under 25. That once a women turns 25 something clicks and all the sudden she is all about getting married and having children. I at the time like everyone else who heard it laughed, but now I find myself thinking about getting married and having kids more, but not just because everyone around me is getting married and having kids. Although I am sure that might have something to do with it.

The last few years have been hard for me and my family and I go through phases of being ok and then not being ok. Which everyone tells me is "normal" but here is where I stand at the moment.

The other day while taking a shower I had this thought that I need to hurry up and get married and have kids because I only have one set of grandparents left and I really want them to be there at my wedding and I want my kids and future husband to meet them. With all that has been going on I have realized how truly blessed I am. I have a great (crazy but great) family. I have amazing friends, a great boss, a job I like and I want someone to share that with.

I want someone to meet my Tio Teo and Tio Geno and see where I get my love of music from. I want someone to meet my mom, aunts, grandmother and Tio Alfredo and see where I get my love of food and cooking from. I want them to meet my older sister and see where I get my love of books and reading from. I want them to meet my father and see where I get my love for people especially children from. I want them to meet my middle sister and see where I get my need to be alone from. I want them to meet Caro, Gabe, Joe, Nat, Kari, Mady, etc and not only see but also meet some of the most important people in my life. I know that is a long list of people to meet but what can I say, I have a large family, which use to drive me crazy to tell you the truth but as I have grown I have learned to love them. So many people, so many personalities and in the end they make me who I am, and I am at the point in life where I want to share them with someone.

Not only because I think they are amazing, but because they truly are amazing, and I want my future husband and children to meet them before its too late. They are already going to miss meeting my maternal grandparents, who where some pretty amazing people. I know that we can share picture and stories but its not the same. You would have had to have met my grandfather to understand his love of jokes, which you can see a little of in my sense of humor, and mama who was quiet and strict but loved her garden, dancing and most of all her family. She also had a wicked sense of humor. I got some of those qualities as well especially the love of family.

When I share this with people they tell me that I shouldn't be in such a hurry that I am still young and that it will happen soon. At that point a part of me agrees with them and there is a part of me that screams that I am not that young and when will this all happen.

I don't want to waste anymore time. If what has happened in the last couple of years has taught me anything is that I don't know how much time I have left with the people who are the most important to me. Papa died with in ten days after we where told he had about 3 months. Mama died six months after that and after mama passed it just seems like we can't go more then three months without someone else in the family or a family friend (who is like family) passing away.

When I was younger I use to think that my grandparents, parents, aunts and uncles will live forever. I now know that is not true. I didn't count on an illness that would slowly steal my father away from me, or losing two grandparents in a year. I didn't count on my brother-in-law getting sick and his need for a transplant and my sister being a perfect match and donating her kidney to him. The day of their operation was one of the hardest day of my life, being so far away and knowing that I couldn't be there.

All that life throws at you, all that we have been through and still have to go through. For example right now I can see that one of my cousin's who I love more then anything, is going through something. She is in pain and there is nothing I can do. "You cant save everyone Karla, no matter how hard you try" is what my friend said to me recently when I was explaining the situation to her. " You cant save everyone". That was so hard to hear.I come from a family where we "save" each other all the time. There are so many of us that there is always someone that you can call who will help you out. So it was so hard for me to hear that I couldn't save her. I know I cant save everyone and I don't want to save everyone but I want to save her, I want her to know that she is not alone that she is worth saving, that there are people who love her. I know she has to go through most of this alone but I want her to know that there are people there who not only love her but want to help her. I know that a part of her knows this already it just that the whole situation is so frustrating.

Sometimes I wish that life came with a remote control where you could rewind and fast forward. I don't usually regret things (something I also got from my grandparents) I was taught to be thankful for what you go through because in the end it makes you a better person, and I truly believe that but there are a few moments where I wish I could rewind, redo and sometimes fast forward. I want to see if I, if we come out alright on the other side.

So You Take A Picture Of Something You See

I am sorry that I am posting this so late but here it is.



The welcome sign at the airport.



Our hotel.



The great thing about Louisville is that they have cool history facts all over town like this.



The bridge by our hotel that connects Louisville to Indiana.



Louisville from the bridge. This is from our trip across the bridge at midnight.


We made it!


Indiana on the way back.


Grover showed up to our conference, I was so excited.


On our last day there we had a few hours until our flight so we went to Churchill Downs.


The original finish post.


Some of the most famous horses of the Derby are buried on the grounds. Barbaro will be buried there in 2009 before the derby.


The names of all the Kentucky Derby winners are placed all around the grounds.


The track.


The jockeys locker room.


This was a gift to the Derby from a British artist.

That was my trip in a nut shell.

¿Donde fuiste a parar, donde estas?

So I just got in a few hours ago from my trip to Louisville. Like always I had a great time. I love it down there.

Every year my boss sends me to this conference that is usually held in Louisville. This year a few of my co-workers where able to come with me.

We arrived late on Saturday night so we went straight to our hotel. Our conference started on Sunday. Sunday night we went to the Hard Rock for dinner. We had a great server who gave us great tips on good place to go see/eat etc, but we were still jet-lagged so we called it a night.

Monday night we went out to eat with the rest of our group who had arrived to Louisville a few days before us. We had a great time. It has been a while since I have laughed that much. During dinner someone said something about crossing the bridge by our hotel over to Indiana, we all thought that was a great idea so that is what we did after dinner. So here we are the five of us crossing the bridge at like midnight laughing and joking around the whole time.The weather was so nice and the view was beautiful.

Yesterday was our last day in Louisville, thankfully our conference ended early so we took the opportunity to go to Churchill Downs. My dad is a huge fan of the Kentucky Derby so I have grown up watching it on t.v., so it was great to actually be there. I took a bunch of pictures for him and got him some souvenirs at the gift shop.

We left Louisville early this morning, it is good to be home but a part of me is going to miss Louisville. I have a bunch of pictures to share but that will have to be another post.

El Papi Chulo List: Part 10

Sorry that it took a while but here it is.



Javier Bardem



Clive Owens



Dylan McDermott



John Stewart



Eric Mabius



Victor Noriega



Chris Brown



Cristiano Ronaldo



Robert Buckley



Lewis Hamilton



Prince Harry



Julian Ovenden



Ryan Gosling



Simon Baker



Milo Ventimiglia



Jason Taylor



Jimmy Jean Louis




Tanoai Reed

All images courtesy of Google.

Me Haces Falta

I really do miss this little blog, and all of you.To all of you who still come by and check to see if I have written anything yet. I thank you for checking in and I apologize for the lack of blogging. There are times where I feel like like I should blog but then I really don't have much to blog about. I am pretty boring...Lol. I am working on that.

Lets see what is going on...I have now lost a total of 9 lbs. So the Great Weight Lost of '08 is going well.Even though, I have no desire to exercise. I mean at all, so I have to find a new motivation for working out. I am still careful with what I eat, I just don't want to work out.

Anyways...

I was reading through this here little blog and I noticed that I owe you guys a new El Papi Chulo List. I am going to work on that some time over the weekend. So please make sure to leave your suggestions in the comment section.

Something To Think About

A few days ago I came across this quote and it stopped me in my tracks. So I thought I would share it with you.

The greatest hazard of all, losing one's self, can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all. No other loss can occur so quietly; any other loss - an arm, a leg, five dollars, a wife, etc. - is sure to be noticed.

I don't know who said this but I found this to be so true and at the same time so sad. I think through out this journey called life we all lose a little bit of ourselves for one reason or the other. I think the greatest battle is trying to find the bits we have lost and reclaiming them.

And So It Is, Just Like You Said It Would Be

Wow, where did the time go? Three years already. I was suppose to post this like 3 days ago but to tell you the truth I totally forgot.

A quick update on the (Great Weight Lost of '08) as my coworker calls it, I have lost 4 lbs that includes the 2 lbs that I had regained. Woot go me! I know that I am doing something right because my mother said something the other day about how I looked skinnier. I wasn't sure that I heard her right so I made her repeat it. Mami and I have always fought about my weight. So for her to notice was a big deal for me. When I started this I did not think it would affect any one else really, but my co-worker who is also trying to lose weight said that I "inspire him to stick to it." Which I thought was very sweet of him.

I received a great compliment the other day from one of the district big wigs when he asked me to co-teach with him at a presentation he was holding for parents in our program. At first I thought he was joking but he was totally serious. So once it set in that he was serious, we got to work on our lesson plan and I have to say that our presentation went very well. At the end of it he told me that I was "amazing" and " very good" at what I do and that my boss was "lucky" to have me. I of course joking around asked him if I could get that in writing. He laughed and said he would email it to me. Still haven't gotten the email. I will let you know if and when I do.

Oh before for I forget I also wanted to share with you that I am finally a college graduate. Yay! I received my diploma last week. So I am super excited about that.

Happy Three Year Anniversary Real Women Have Curves!

Real Women Have Curves Part 2

Happy New Year! May 2008 bring you all many great and wonderful things.

I know, I suck at this blogging thing.

Two years ago when I started this little blog it was suppose to be a way for me to track my weight lost journey. Pretty soon I stopped blogging about my weight lost, and I started blogging about everything else. Soon after that I stopped trying to lose weight.

Two years later here I am, right back where I started. I have always been a "big" girl. I was a fat baby, a fat kid, a fat teenager and now a fat adult.

Everyone has an " Ah ha" moment and mines came this summer. In August I went to Fiesta Tropical '07 with my cousins. I spent the whole time guarding our table while they where out dancing and having a good time. I felt like crap and I was pissed. Mostly at myself for letting myself get this out of control.

It still took me two months to decide to do something about it. In November during all the After-Thanksgiving sales I went out and bought a new Elliptical. At first I used it here and there still not ready to make a change. Then I went to an other party and as I was getting ready it hit me, " I can't keep living like this."

So I started working out more and I started to clean up the way I ate. So far instead of gaining weight during this holiday season, I lost 3 lbs. So what does all of this mean for this little blog, it means that I will start to blog more about my attempt to lose weight as well as other things that are going on in my life.

This is not my first attempt at losing weight and I know that the road ahead is a long and hard one, but something tells me that this time I am going to reach my goal.I may not know what is going to happen in the future, but there is one thing I know for sure when Fiesta Tropical '08 comes around I WON'T be the one guarding the table.